*sings*A new fantastic point of view…*sings*

Okay, enough of that. So this past Thursday, Calvin and I went to the final session in a 3 part series at the Jewish Community Center on “God at Mt. Siani”. We had gone to all three sessions, which basically were an educational experience for us in how the three main Jewish denominations think about inspiration and revelation of the Torah. The first night was the orthodox point of view, then last week was the reformed, then finally this past Thursday was the conservative. All-in-all, it was just really fascinating. It is one thing to hear people say, “Well the Jews say this, or this,” but to hear them speak on it themselves was fantastic. Not only that, but we got out feet wet in understanding Judaism as a whole, meaning, how the religion works and what it is about.

The lectures were set up in a panel format, where the certain rabbi that was giving the main lecture than night would speak for 20-25 minutes, and then the other two (or three; one night there was a Hasidic rabbi there as well) rabbis would have the opportunity to respond to what he said. Then, the moderator, who was a professor from the BU college of Judaic studies (or something like that) would open up the floor for questions from the audience. Just to see the interaction between the different points of view, and all that, was fascinating. Anyways, we learned alot, and were given much food for thought. I’m glad that we attended, even if it was quite obvious that we were the only goyim there, sitting in the back of the room with our little notepads scribbling furiously!

I only wish I wasn’t such a chicken; I wanted especially after the final session to talk with the reformed Rabbi, as he graduated from the same school as our beloved Rabbi Snyder, Hebrew Union College, but alas, I am afraid I am still much too shy in such situations. And my husband isn’t much better.
Now, I’m going to work my way through Galatians, to see if my understanding of Jewish thought has helped my understanding of Paul any. One big thought that the light bulb went on for me on is that for Judaism (and they said this over and over!) it’s about doing doing doing, not faith. The reformed Rabbi even mentioned the difference specifically between their ancestors, the Pharisees, and the Hebrew Christians in regards to how they viewed things. The Hebrew Christians stressed faith –> works, whereas the Pharisees stressed works –> faith. Now mind you, I’m still not sure if we’re talking getting in here, because the Jews were (are?) all in already, you must understand. Or maybe “in” and “out” are just not words we should be using at all. But somehow there is a huge difference, and I began to understand that just sitting there listening to these rabbis expound on their own religion.

Well anyways, I just wanted to say something about our little fun journey into a world not our own.

This sounded fun and silly, thanks for the idea Diana.

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet and recent street name) Bonnie Dickinson

2. YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME: (grandfather/grandmother on your dad’s side, your favorite candy) Mary Sweet Tart

3. YOUR “FLY GIRL/GUY” NAME: (first initial of first name, first two or three letters of your middle name) Cama

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal) Purple Cat

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born) Amanda Miami

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (first 3 letters of your last name, last 3 letters of mother’s first name) Parene

7. JEDI NAME: (middle name spelled backwards, your mom’s maiden name spelled backwards) Adnama Ttnag

9. SUPERHERO NAME: (”The”, your favorite color, the automobile you drive) The Purple Honda

It’s funny, I’ve always in my mind marked the end of a year not by December 31st, but by the end of a school year. After all, I’ve spent 16 years of my life in school! This year, the first year since I was 6 that I haven’t been in school, I haven’t had that marker. All the same, as I’m going to be going back this fall, I still feel in my bones that turning as spring has come around the corner.

Calvin and I attended my alma mater’s commencement this past Saturday. It was…well, graduation. I just wanted to go because I like seeing all the professors in their fancy getups. And the floppy hats, I just can’t get over the floppy hats! Okay, I had some friends graduating and that’s why I really went, but anyways…

It got me all excited about starting school again this fall. I’m just chomping at the bit to get back into education. While I think this year has been good for Calvin and I, and certainly practical from a financial perspective, I am anxious to get back on track for what I actually want to do with my life. I mean, selling boots and socks online can be fun and all, but it’s really rather pointless! I’d much rather be translating Hebrew and studying the Hebrew Bible. And if (and this is a big if) we can scrape up the money, I might cross-register a class at Harvard Divinity School! I already have my eye on one - Myth and Myth-Making in the Biblical and Ancient Near Eastern World. I think I’ve died of happiness!! And I’m going to take Aramaic and, and, Ugaritic too! (At Gordon-Conwell.) And I might have the opportunity to take an archaeological travel seminar to Israel! That is, of course, assuming that I can afford to take time off of work during the summer, and also assuming (and maybe this is the bigger if) I can manage to not be such a wussy city-girl.

Unfortunatly, most people I know think I’ve gone off the deep end…so I try to limit my discussion of such things to “I’m going to seminary and I’m going to teach” which is perfectly true. But I don’t know how many people understand just how much it excites me that I’m going to learn more about these things…and then when I try to explain how learning about these things is going to help me teach people in the church, they really think I’ve gone off the deep end. I just…I just have a passion for taking the ivory towers down off of their pedestals and making them accessible to the average person. Why should the average person only have access to Christian slop? Yet many people who write non-slop don’t seem to care to make it understandable to the average person. Don’t seem to care to want to take these ancient things and take them and show people how it really matters to their understanding of the Bible. All people hear is droning about things that they think don’t matter. But they do! Joe Sunday School teacher doesn’t have to know Aramaic, or Ugaritic, or even Hebrew (though that would be my ultimate dream), but shouldn’t he have access to materials written by people who do know Hebrew, and who are real scholars? People who want to take scholarship and somehow…somehow…I don’t know what I’m saying. I’m rambling. I have a passion. I have a passion for what some people see as two very different things. Scholarship, ancient near eastern studies…and practial Christian living and Bible study. Yet I don’t think that they have to be so far apart. But that article by Fox got me thinking about all of this. See “faith-based scholars” want to ignore scholarship because of their faith. They want to ignore things that make them uncomfortable. So they can’t be real scholars. But what about people who really are scholars but then want to take what they study and make it available to their faith community for review and consideration? Does that make them not scholars? I don’t know. Somehow the two worlds have to meet, people have to make it meet, so that Joe Christian has more than what is available now.

So I have to go learn more, and get my Ph.D, and learn Ugaritic, and I don’t know what exactly that means right now, but I know that’s what I have to do. I will do my small part. I can’t change the world, in fact, I probably can’t change much of anything, but, I can be faithful to…well, if the passion and path combined is what you would name a “call”, then faithful to my calling. Though I don’t like using words like that, because I really don’t know that that means. I mean God didn’t exactly call me up on the phone. But what else would I do? I think when one says to oneself, “What else could I do with my life and still be faithful to God?” one must realize one is one the right path, at the least, where ever it may lead.

Okay, this is totally way longer than I meant it to be and really went way off subject. I really just meant to say that I went to Davis’s graduation and saw all the nice floppy hats. And just to keep a goal in mind, I spliced myself a nice picture from last year’s pictures of graduation (floppy hat courtesy of Dr. Parker’s head, which fit the best onto mine out of all the floppy hats I had pictures of!):

Jeremiah 15:6 (ESV)
6You have rejected me, declares the LORD;
you keep going backward,
so I have stretched out my hand against you and destroyed you–
I am weary of relenting.

When I came to this passage in Jeremiah I became trapped in it. I read it over and over again. This verse in particular burned in my mind. Set in the immediate context of Jeremiah’s intercession to God for for his people and God’s refusal to change his mind as he did for other “powerhouses” of the faith, it shook me and then grieved me.

While the concept of “lo-ruhamah” is certainly not new to me, it is stated so bluntly and in such a…human…way here that it took me somewhat aback. God, tired of changing his mind, tired of taking it back, tired of saying he’s going to judge and then relenting, giving another chance, his hesed flowing on and on. It seems, however, that even God’s compassion has an end. Eventually, it reaches the end of the line and enough is enough. Except…these are his people. He’s tired of having compassion on his people. It’s the last straw. They’ve stepped over the line. He’s had it up to here. In another way of looking at it, they’ve drained him, sapped his compassion and mercy, made him weary. There are so many way to look at it, and all of them astounding. God, tired of relenting. Where does that fit intou our theological boxes?

Then after I was done being taken aback, I was grieved. How could God’s people have gotten to such a point, that God could have become weary of feeling sorry for them, giving that compassion? To the point where he hardened his heart against them, and let the wrath flow? Destroyed them? And if it grieves me, under the weariness and behind the wrath, how must it have grieved God? How must it have hurt him that they turned away, again and again, despite his continual in-spite-of-ness?

And then I wonder: would we know it if God tired of relenting today? How would we know? Has he already? What would judgment look like? Are we bad enough yet? What would bad enough be? These sort of things should scare the Church into obedience, but we’re just like Israel: we’re his people, and surely God wouldn’t judge his own people, so we think. He’s too compassionate and loving, and forgiving. Well, apparently God’s compassion can run out. I don’t think we want to find out when.

Finally, I think this verse is a good summary of much of the book of Jeremiah. While there are some hopeful restoration sections sprinkled here and there, much of it is more of the same. And can you imagine being poor Jeremiah, called by God, yet knowing it’s a hopeless cause, at least in his lifetime? The poor guy is an emotional wreck; one day he’s begging God to stay his hand of judgement, the next he’s pleading with him to zap them all. He has plots against his life, he’s thrown in a pit, and when he tries so hard to do the prophet intersession thing, he gets a firm rebuttal from God. And all the while, and maybe this is the worst of it all, his heart is broken and continually grieving.

In my own small way, I can identify with Jeremiah in his grief. At times my heart feels as though it’s going to implode with the tension. I enjoy the book of Jeremiah because it allows not only a look at a message, but a look at the heart of the person carrying the message. Jeremiah is unique in that respect. Not only that, but boy does God say some exciting things.